PONYTAILS, BANKRUPTCY AND POLITCALLY CORRECT TERMS OVERSHADOW GABBYS GOLD MEDALS...BUT NOT FOR LONG!

I have not seen one moment of the 2012 Olympics. I have heard a lot about Gabby Douglas, a gulp, "African American" and her hair, and the fact that her Mother filed bankruptcy earlier this year. I don't even know how many medals shes won. Gymnastics is one of my favorite sports to watch. I remember wanting to follow after Nadia Comaneci and her perfect 10's. I walked faithfully to practice at the high school which was about 3 miles from my house but I went anyway. My parents let me go, but they did not have money for me to pursue anything seriously. For them it was a way for me to be busy while they both worked. For me it was a dream to be able to stand on the balance beam or swing on the parallel bars. I was actually the first one in class to do the splits...alongside other girls who had taken years of dance already. My dreams ended when the class did. I still followed competitions when they were on and like lots of other little girls who are watching Gabby Douglas today I was content to be the spectator.
I go to my homepage and see that the media is more focused on how Douglas wears her hair. She wears it like lots of other gymnasts, in a ponytail, quite sensible I would say. Would they care how she wore her hair if she wasn't African American. How do they think all the other American (Caucasian) and European and Asian gymnast wear their hair? Is she supposed to wear cornrows or quadruple braids? Hairstyles worn by some "African American" little girls? I don't get it...can we focus on her Olympian feats instead of her hair?
 Douglas was not the medias "Darling" coming into these Olympic games, Jordyn Weiber was the medias pick. The odds on favorite, Weiber who was touted as the next Marylou, the next Nadia, was out of contention. Guess how she wears her hair? Yep in that sensible ponytail. In a twist here is a photo of Weiber in cornrows..

"African American"? I don't care if shes Mexican American, Italian American or German American...Douglas is American. I get offended when people say aren't you Mexican...ugh no I was born here. I consider myself American. Who cares? Its obvious I am of Mexican descent. Nationality, ethnicity, race, color whatever you want to call it. These athletes are competing for America, Team USA. Lets applaud their hard work and  merits.

Then there is the news that Olympian Ryan Lochte's parents are facing foreclosure and that Douglas' Mother had filed bankruptcy earlier this year. Douglas' Mother, Natalie Hawkins a single mother of four filed bankruptcy. So what. So did I, oh but that's right I am not the mother of an Olympian, (not yet anyway). I know I personally make a lot of sacrifices for my children, especially my football/baseball playing daughter. Hawkins had to get her daughter the best coach she could and that meant sending her 3,000 miles away from home to fulfill her dreams. Dreams and hard work that obviously paid off. How many people in the United States have not filed bankruptcy this year? It doesn't make any difference to me. This only solidifies my belief that some athletes are cut from a different cloth, and that those who pursue the greatness they are destined for achieve a lot of the success that they do because their parents and others, coaches, and in Douglas' case host families make a lot of sacrifices. Sacrifice is the word that comes to mind when I hear about the parents of these wonderful athletes. It is not easy to let your child move away to train, or to find the money to do it. No one is investing in these athletes future, no one but their parents, families, coaches and them. That the hard work pays off is the cherry on top. After all the Olympic gold medal is only monetarily worth 644 dollars, but in terms of endorsements and future earnings well its value is something these athletes aren't even thinking about when they are training or competing. I think whatever Douglas does she has a bright future ahead of her regardless of her hair or the fact that her Mom filed bankruptcy. I for one am glad to see all little girls realize that they have a heroine they can identify with, child of a single mom, with good sensible values, and a dream that she has just realized.

good hair..bad hair...freckles or tan are u defined by these as a woman of color?

I am 100% Mexican American. My love is 1/2 African American and 1/2 Chippewa, Native American for those that do not know what Chippewa is. The native name is Ojibwe. We have three beautiful daughters from our sometimes tumultuous and stormy union. None of them resemble the other and this was cause for a lot of unspoken side glances and whispered gossip among family and strangers alike. When I would go to the doctors office I would inevitably get glances and doubletakes and stares when I referred to my daughters as sisters. "Oh they are sisters?" was the common question I would get. "Yes they are sisters and before you ask, yes they have the same father," I would add. I knew that was the next question on these gossipy ghetto fab chicks minds sitting in the office with their babies. I always felt the need to explain my childrens heritage and ethnic makeup, I don't know why. Just seemed that once they knew there was a legitimate reason why my caramel colored, doe eyed doll and her dresden skinned, almond eyed sister were so different, their tone and stares stopped.

I will admit that I was quite nervous when I was pregnant with my first daughter. I had nightmares that she would some how inherit the "bad" hair I had heard about from my loves Aunts. I even had dreams that she would be this ebony skinned little baby that no one would believe was mine. My love is a nice caramel color in the summer and sometimes even lighter than me, a fair skinned Mexican. His hair had wavy curls, when he had hair that is. My Father even said I ended up with a Black man to spite him, so surely he would feel the same way about my baby. Oh but when she arrived her beautiful little face and coal black "good" hair made his heart melt and everyone elses. When my second daughter arrived she was this redskinned rat faced little baby with tiny little slits for eyes and golden tips on her light reddish brown hair. In a few weeks time she turned into this pre-dresden skinned little pink beauty. When I see them next to eachother now I think how beautiful they are. Each envying things in the other, my caramel girl has curly waves and my fair skinned porcelain doll has straight. She looked like a little china doll when she was little. Then there is my mini-me she is nothing that they are and she is every bit her mama.

I had asked my love when he was little was it hard for him growing up. He said he was called "zebra" and "white boy". He felt different and was treated as such by his Aunt's and Grandma's, at least that was his perception. Other people did not believe him when he told them who his mom was, people thought he was adopted. He said he felt reverse racism even in his own home with family talking about "white folks" and equally talking about "black folks" too. He said he did not fit in with the Blacks or the Whites and settled on being a class clown to get attention and fit in. He felt angry, confused, like he should not have been born. He learned to become a chameleon, observing other people to fit in, but in his neighborhood he was rejected in many ways. He says he was not "hood" enough, he did not speak in the street slang, but rather in a more respectful manner. He says he felt the need to "come up or down to the individuals level" more for their comfort than his own. When he went to jail for the first time he had to choose who to affiliate with, he chose his Indian heritage something he was told often as a young child, "your father is Indian and that makes you Indian". Associating with them was far less drama laden than claiming White or Black. Looking back on it now he feels that he learned to fit in in any situation and that maybe at the time it was hard on him but it has served him well in life. So I knew my daughters would have the same problems somewhere down the road.

There are little comments or remarks that are made and I hate that I get defensive about them. I will never forget being in the grocery store when my oldest was about 5 and my middle was about 3. She was sitting in a cart and kept looking at this black lady who had these long beautiful braids, staring at her every turn she made. Finally the lady made this remark "Actin' like they never seen a black person before!" and she started to stomp off and I said, "Thats funny because they are black and they see their Aunts and Grandmas all the time." She looked at me and I know she was seething... but I did add, "she's just never seen extensions." This was in the 90's pre Tyra and Beyonce extensions, braids were the common look. I secretly felt good inside HAH I told her! Once my oldest entered school she had a little bully who called her "blackie" keep in mind this Mexican child was darker than my daughter. Also keep in mind that I live in a town that though there are color lines it  is not as backwoods as the next town over. We have a mix of nationalities. My little girl would come home in tears. So finally when she asked me why she was the color she was. I took a lesson from my Grandma Katie who called them chocolate and vanilla, I read a story called "Grandma Blue" to the class. Took some Neopolitan ice cream and took out a scoop of vanilla saying it was me, and then I took out the chocolate and strawberry saying this was her Dad. Then I mixed them and showed the kids the color and I asked is the ice cream still good? Of course they all said yes. I explained to them some of us might have more chocolate, or vanilla or strawberry and it shouldn't matter because we are all still the same. So that saying mean things to each other or calling someone names was just not nice. Then they all got ice cream and my daughter was the hit of the year. No more tears that year anyway.

 I check the box that says "other" on paperwork for their race/ethnicity. I guess that being who they are sometimes can be the issue of the day and that will subside as they get older.I find it sad that my oldest daughter was not black enough to hang out with the black girls and my middle daughter oddly has more black friends. Personally I think my daughter was seen as a threat to all those black girls who hated her "good hair" and her "high yellow" skin. When they tell people their ethnicity they get puzzled looks and "no you are not!" as if being Black, Mexican, and Native American has a set skin tone. My youngest fits in with everyone anywhere, but that is because she is outgoing. So I find it strange that my straighthaired girl still flatirons her hair as much as my curly locked daughter. My freckle faced girl hates her freckles she who barely tans 1/2 a shade when in the sun all day. My oldest is tan all year round. My hair is more nappy than any of theirs! Oooh and girl my "kitchen" is a mess, (that is the nape hair on your head). Good hair, bad hair, bee stung lips, or just right lips, freckles, or tan.... these things don't define you. As a good friend says "I define me!" Embrace your uniqueness.